Sellers Gang Mama

Confessions of a Happily Married Mother of Twins Trying to Keep a Sense of Self & Sanity One Day at a Time

Judgey McJudger October 2, 2009

Filed under: Uncategorized — Heather Sellers @ 12:38 pm

I mentioned in a previous post how smug and judgmental I was before I had Jaxson and Elizabeth.

What I didn’t realize is that other mothers are much more judgment AFTER you have the baby (babies). Not only do they judge you about your every parenting move from diaper brand to breast feeding to clothing choices, but they judge you about the actual birth process itself. So here we go, I am going to shout it loud and proud.

I do not breastfeed. I have never breastfed. I do not pump. I have done none of it. Not once. I didn’t even try.

I use disposal diapers. They are not organic. They are not Wal-Mart brand. They are Huggies, they have Mickie and Minnie on them and they go in my diaper genie elite 2 and then that goes in the trash. This woman is not standing over a toilet shaking poo into it and then washing poo and pee filled diapers THREE times for two babies. I don’t have $1,000 to stock up on cloth diapers and I don’t have the time for that crazy cleaning process. NOT HAPPENING.

I was induced. I had an epidural. Then it stopped working, so they gave me more. Then I stopped progressing so I got prepped for a c-section after 12 hours of labor with Petocin. Then when we got to the OR the epidural wasn’t working so they had to put me completely under anesthesia for my delivery. My babies were out of me an hour before I got to hold them and I was groggy when I finally did.

But  let me tell you something else.

My children are both at a healthy weight. They both eat well and have responded great to formula.

My children have NEVER had diaper rash. NOT once. If I think they maybe look a little red, I immediately treat them with desitin and watch them like a hawk.

My grandma (who takes care of my babies Tuesday-Friday) is not inconvenienced with heating up breast milk or having to wash cloth diapers. That was very important to me. She enjoys taking care of them and it does not burden her.

I remember holding my babies the night they were born. I bonded with and loved them immediately. Unlike what some women who have never had a c-section or given birth at all for that matter say, having a c-section does not ruin the bonding you have with your child. Nor does having a c-section make me wimpy or less of a mother/woman then anyone else.

I hate reading blogs where women are attacking each others choices as pregnant women and as mothers. The reason that the media plays up this whole “Mommy Wars” thing is because women do that to each other. So how about we stop. How about we embrace each other,  be open minded to different choices and parenting styles, and support each other simply because we are all doing our very best to raise healthy and happy children. What does it matter if we all do it a little differently?


One Response to “Judgey McJudger”

  1. KK Says:

    I think women are hardest on each other regarding every topic. It’s so sad that women put each other down so easily. The bottom line is that you have to do what is best for you and your family. If your family is happy and healthy, that is all that matters. Period.

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