In the midst of the pain and serious anxiety that went with this whole kidney experience there were a few bright moments. All of which happen whilst (don’t you love the word whilst? I sure do!) on morphine.
They gave me a morphine pump, ya’ll. They made it so I pushed this little green button and it just put the morphine right into my IV, no buzzing a nurse who takes 30 minutes to come to you, just a straight shot. Holy Cow Batman! For a woman who had been in horrific pain on and off for a month I was delighted! But I also am not a huge fan of the loopy drug feeling morphine provides before you fall asleep so I didn’t use it crazy or anything, don’t get worried about me.
However, the few times I did use it, hilarity ensued! Mom and Hannah came up to see me and give me some company while Jess had to work a wedding that night and I think I made my mom turn red approximately 100 times in the short hour they were there.
Now, you see, I am modest, conservative, watch my language (usually!) and rarely inappropriate. But I had the little green button and narcotics coursing through my veins makes me act nuts. Somehow we ended up discussing things that were way to grown up for my 15-year-old baby sister to hear and that I normally would never talk about in front of her, or anyone for that matter and I crazily told my mom “Better she hear it from us then those punk kids at school.” Oh goodness, ya’ll, I thought my mama was gonna lose it.