Does anybody else watch the Bachelor?
I have not watched that ridiculous show since the first season and for some crazy reason I have watched it this season. I seriously think this stuff is insanity. They are calling this season Wings of Love. Are you people serious? He’s a pilot so you went for wings of love? Wow ABC, you really stretched your creative muscles there. Maybe you should have had Vienna come up with the title, it could have been “Floating on Cloud Jake.” (Insert vomiting here because yes she did actually say on national television that she was floating on cloud Jake. It’s totally fine if you need to go throw up and then come back and read the rest of this, I won’t be offended.)
Ok so here are my comments thus far:
1. You are not going to find love in the fake love fest world of The Bachelor. It’s just not gonna happen. Seriously. It’s like being at Disney Land and saying you’re in love with Mickey Mouse. Well heck yes it’s all about Mickey while you are at DL, but don’t you think when you get home to the real world you are going to be like “umm, thanks for the good times Mick but I’m over it”? Yeah, you are, admit it.
2. Vienna-you make me want to gag myself with a spoon. I read spoilers that Jake picks you. Eww. You make my skin crawl, for real.
3. Jake did you really cry when you went bungee jumping? Really? You’re a pilot that’s afraid of heights? And you are glad that you could overcome this fear of heights with Vienna as a couple? Umm, newsflash pretty boy, your not a couple, your still dating like 12 other women. Also, first kiss upside down on the bungee cord-cue more vomiting at Heather’s house.
4. Ali- I love you! You are amazing. Thanks for not sitting their playing nice with that stupid Vienna when she fake apologized. Way to keep it real, well as real as one can on a reality show at least.
5. Chris Harrison is skeezy. The inappropriate relationship scandal was total nonsense and that dude was totally the center of that circus with his serious face and stern voice. Hey Chris, you host the Bachelor? Your whole job is to come out and say that this is the final rose of the night. Get over yourself.
6. Why does CH have to come out and tell us it’s the final rose. I can count and I can see. There is one rose left on the tray and my deductive reasoning tells me there are no more roses. Anybody else confused and super thankful that Chris tells us that?
7. Elizabeth-I really want to smack you appreciate that you make my daughter’s name look bad. Jake is right, you are a complete tease.
8. Lastly, Michelle. Oh Michelle, you’re bananas in pajamas. You are totally off your tiny 100 pound rocker sweetie.
Anyone else have comments on this nonsense? Anyone? Please? It makes me feel less lame if other people watch the stupid things that I watch. Come on ladies, help me out.
Edited to add: There are some women (or a woman) at my office who MOCK me for watching this and decided to tell me that I need to get a life. Obviously my life is not revolving around these lame reality shows. Why do some feel the need to be rude?